Find your way back home to yourself, one choice at at time...

Our way back home to ourselves happens one choice at a time…

How did we end up with our collection of masks? How did that happen? Thinking back, I accumulated mine one choice at a time. One compromise at a time. One uncomfortable moment at a time.

That one choice didn’t seem like a big deal but just as a train switches its track one time, the trajectory is modified. If you compound each choice, you can end up a long way from home.

Pause before mindlessly choosing…

This blog space, AKA, “Summer Camp for your Soul” is all about coming home to yourself and the good news is we can find our way back home, in the same manner we got off-track, one choice at a time!

Where do we start?

Differentiating our masks from our true skin can be tricky, so let’s start with a question.

What in my life do I dread?  

Many times, we can’t name what the “it” is. Instead of looking at dread as a negative thing what if it was a gift? An invitation to pay attention.

Would you experiment with me? I invite you to NOTICE when dread surfaces and just NAME it. Kinda give it a gentle nod, and let it know you see it.

But what if you aren’t able to even notice the dread because it’s masked under:

• The mindless choice to open the wine, fridge or freezer to take the edge off.

• Or mindlessly choosing to pick up our phone and get lost scrolling, binge watching Netflix or adding items to our Amazon cart.

• Or you get “busy” with work, exercise, cleaning, etc.

If you’re able, NOTICE the second before you pick up one of the above comforts. Notice it and NAME it. Give it a kind look and let yourself know you see a part of you has something to say but another part of you doesn’t want to hear it. Let them both know you see them.

Choosing to pause will get you closer to home.

Another area to be mindful about is when you feel uncomfortable. Again, this feeling can be a part of you trying to get your attention. If you do nothing other than acknowledge it, you are still making a choice in the right direction. Pausing for 5 seconds when something feels a little off can make a difference.

Sadie Robertson was talking to teens when she said, “5 seconds of awkward, can save you from a lifetime of regret” but how true for all of us. Maybe we could modify it to, “5 seconds of discomfort can help me find my way back home to myself”.

If you want to do more than just acknowledge the dread or the discomfort, ask yourself the next question:

Am I open to knowing more about the dread or discomfort?

If not, what might the resistance be about. Lean in with curiosity. Just notice what you notice.

Way back when, we may have ignored the discomfort of a situation and chose to compromise a part of us.

It’s not too late to be kind to that part. It’s never too late. One choice at a time we can begin to pay attention.

Unsure of our blurry & lonely path, we were uncomfortable in our skin and chose another path that looked more comfortable.

So, we’ve Noticed and Named some things, now what?

Talk to God…The next step is taking what you’ve named and noticed to God. Ask Him what He thinks.

If you want to go all in, I find getting on my knees for this part puts me in a humble state of listening.

This all boils down to a 3-step process:

1. NOTICE

2. NAME

3. KNEEL

Growing up in the church, I learned a lot ABOUT God but not so much about HOW to have a relationship with him. You may be in a similar boat, so let me give an example of what talking to God may sound like.

“God…creator of the universe. You created my inmost being. You know when I sit or when I stand. You know the number of hairs on my head. YOU know me better than I know myself.

So what I’m about to tell you, you already know…but I suppose it’s helpful to just talk with you about it.. God, I’m dreading _________, I don’t even know why for sure.

Would you help me understand what is behind that? If I’m honest, I’m scared to find out. What will I have to do if I acknowledge this?

God, you are a gentle shepherd, reveal to me your truth and help me to be willing to hear from you. I know you are good, help me, because even though I know you are good, I don’t always believe You are to me.”

How do we hear from Him? He speaks to us in so many ways…you can stay and just sit quietly and listen for a bit. You may open your Bible, and something may be relevant that He shows you as you read. You may go for a walk and something in nature speaks to you. Sometimes it’s through closed doors and sometimes through open doors. 

Choose to make space to listen - He is a gentleman, so He’s not likely to interrupt your busyness.

I hope you choose to find a few moments to pause with these questions.

The good news is - Course correction happens one choice at a time. You don’t have to fix it all at once.

For today, just choose to listen to those feelings of dread and/or discomfort. They have information that will help you.

Faith is not knowing what the end journey looks like but trusting the One who knows.

We each have been given our own song to sing. Each one, shines a light, bringing out the God colors in the world. (Matt 5:14-16 Msg)

Did this spark something in you? Are you interested in a more personalized version of this process? One where you’d have a safe person to walk with and help you connect dots in your own story. If so, coaching may be your next step. To learn more about working with me as a life coach, click HERE.   

I’ll leave you with some words God says about our choices.  

This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. Deuteronomy 30:19-20

In case you’re wondering about my faith, I come from a Christian Perspective. If you’re interested in learning more about what that means here is a very simple overview of Christianity from a children’s book. For Christianity to make sense, you must start at the beginning. Check out this lovely children’s book, written by Carl Laferton - The Garden & The Curtain & The Cross read by the Illustrator, Catalina Echeverri, HERE.

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Check out some additional posts from fellow Hope*Writers using the prompt word “Choices”:

The Power of Choice. What Does God Say? by Sharla Hallett

https://sharlahallett.com/the-power-of-choice-what-does-god-say/

The Life You Want by Ashley Olivine

https://www.ashleyolivine.com/the-life-you-want/

A Place to Belong: What Influences Our Choices by MelAnn

http://unidentity.online/a-place

Simple Is Better - Oh, the Choices That We Make! by Dianne Vielhuber

https://simplewordsoffaith.com/2023/05/01/simple-is-better-oh-the-choices-that-we-make/

Photo credits: Canva